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Jonah, buy me a new phone now.
I think Jonah likes breaking phones because he is a weird person and likes breaking phones.
Jonah is a bad person and needs to be locked up. Here's why:
One time, he locked me in a shed.
He is also a war criminal and does bad people things.
Jonah likes to lie and say it was an old dood's butt that broke the phone,
but it was actually him.
